Portrait of a Mary Sue

Actual Mongoose Pirate

The only image I could find of a mongoose pirate

In this blog, MongoosePirate, a history buff with way too much time on his hands, will look over some of the more colorful content that has graced this wiki in the past ranging from impractical weapons to impractical spin-offs of canon groups. Not all of these pages were bad, but all of them were deleted for one reason or another. Let's dive in...

The first entry in this series is a guy with an unfortunate name to say the least: the quintessential Mary-Sue Josh Everstrike. Created on September 2, 2010 by Greenhero55, Josh Everstrike started out as your run-of-the-mill first page. That is, he was a teenage vault dweller from Vault 326 (no description given) in the Philadelphia Wasteland. His mother died two days after he was born, orphans galore! At fourteen, he got his first gun: "A laser Pistol with Ammounition". Emerging from his vault armed with a Vault 326 Wasteland Manual along with his friend Luke Derker, John Everstrike set out to improve the wasteland like his inspiration, the Lone Wanderer. Coming upon a town named Argon, the two have some fish out of water antics and the page ends. Also, he's 7'3".

John Everstrike

The Man Himself

Obviously, John Everstrike was problematic for a number of reasons besides his rather sensational name. He came from Vault 326, a far cry from the canonical 122 (and god knows how many unnumbered ones). Also, he was a master of animals due to reading a couple of books. Commenters on his talk page tore the author a new one.

Ignoring most of the criticism, Greenhero added in an arch-nemesis/bully for Josh Everstrike, the equally banal yet bizarrely named Kyle Horanbourne. A sadistic retard with fetal alcohol syndrome, Kyle was about as shallow as a teaspoon. During his time in the vault, Kyle shot Josh a couple of times in their home vault and was not punished for it. None of it seemed to make sense.

After going through mountains of criticism, Greenhero linked his personal wiki and gave his "thanks" to his critics.


The Title Image of Greenhero's Wiki. Remind you of anything?

All in all, Josh Everstrike was a rather bland character whose only real memorable quality was his name. He was just another Mary Sue Lone Wanderer ripoff that was passing through. I think the final comment on its talk page sums it up pretty well:

"Greenhero, if you had just put more work into your articles after you where told what was wrong with them, you wouldn't be in this mess right now. If you have the balls, take into note what has been told to you, edit your articles to create much deeper stories and show everyone how wrong they are. The whole reboot thing was done to clear out all the crap and make the wiki shine again, in the first place, so now there's a 'zero shit tolerance'. And stating that you will kill yourself won't help anyone. Not us and certainly not you. Reincarnation sucks, I'm sorry. ---Seqeu0"

The members of the wiki wanted nothing to do with Greenhero, and Greenhero did not want anything to with the wiki after he was criticized, another unfortunate lack of communication on this wiki. So, Josh Everstrike was deleted.

Next time, we investigate Vegas before New Vegas...

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